This first question is for the dudes. Have you ever found yourself in the middle of a pee in a public restroom and you hear female voices coming from outside and immediately think you may be in the wrong bathroom? Then, you look down and realize you’re peeing at a urinal and they don’t have those in women’s bathrooms — or at least that is what we’ve been told.
Do women even know what a urinal looks like in real life? I guess from TV and movies, right? But I bet they would look weird in real life if you weren’t used to seeing them all the time.
I remember back in middle school the boys thought it was funny to lock each other in the girls bathroom. It was like the scariest thing that could happen, because that is exactly where you would go to catch the cooties. One day our teacher got annoyed and split the class into two groups: girls and boys.
She then took the girls on a field trip to the boys bathroom and the boys on a field trip to the girls bathroom to show us they were basically the same. I think one boy asked, “hey, where’s the urinals?” I remember the girl’s room having pink tiles on the wall, while we had blue — like a gender reveal party.
Here’s another bathroom thing I hear all the time lately. Any time the line for the Men’s bathroom is longer than the Women’s, I hear about seventeen different people say the same thing, “Wow, the men’s line is longer than the women’s? That never happens.”
What I noticed lately is that this does happen, often. Usually at places like the movies, after watching a big action movie. Something like Top Gun: Maverick or any new Marvel or Star Wars. It happens at sporting events and at rock concerts. It even happens at casinos (last time I was at the Hard Rock).
I’m pretty sure the men’s line is longer than the women’s line in most bathrooms, other than bars. And even there, lately the men have had a longer line. It was in college when women’s lines were always longer.
That’s all the bathroom thoughts I’ve had lately. I hope you enjoyed them. Thanks and I’ll be back later this week or next week with a special new post if everything goes as planned.
For the past several years, anytime someone has asked a friend, “Hey where can I buy one of those?” The answer has been, “I don’t know man, check Amazon.” Everything is cheaper on Amazon, you get FREE super fast shipping (especially since we are all Prime members now), and you don’t have to bother any live humans — you just click a few buttons and your stuff will arrive either later today, tomorrow or the day after (anything longer than that is not worth your time).
The other great thing about Amazon is if you don’t like something you ordered you can easily send it back. And, if they try to make you pay for the return shipping, you can just change your answer to, “it’s your fault, not mine, Amazon!” and now your return shipping is FREE.
Beating Amazon
So, how did I beat Amazon? Well, I have beaten them before in a different way, and I have shared that story, but here’s a quick refresher. I had ordered a Nintendo Wii U (on Cyber Monday), but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to keep it or not. Next, I received a “lost in transit” message about that order, but it still somehow showed up to my door. So, I canceled my order and got to keep the Wii U for FREE. This is a totally different way of beating Amazon, and I’ve beaten them with “lost in transit” items a couple of times before. That just happened to be the biggest one.
This time I beat them on pricing. I was searching for a Kayak Captain’s hat (or straw hat). My sister has one that she always wear by Avid, so I first looked at those. When I asked her about her hat she told me that it had a tear and she had ordered a new one from a different brand, Hemlock Hat Co.
I was curious, so I checked out both Amazon and each hat makers site (Avid and Hemlock). Amazon has a terrible user interface (UI) when it comes to switching between versions of the same item — It opens a new page for each style/color, instead of simply changing the image. Because of this I stuck with online shopping on the Hemlock site, just to find the right model.
I found one I really liked and it was on sale. That’s when I stuck it in my cart. I went back to Amazon to check the price and the same style was almost fifteen freakin’ dollars more expensive. I thought that the difference may be added in shipping costs. Luckily, shipping was less than fifteen dollars ($9.00). In the end I purchased my hat from Hemlock’s website, and it came in a nice box with lots of cushion.
Some Cool Captain Kayak Photos
What We Learned
Not only did I beat Amazon’s price, or better yet Hemlock did, but I was happy to support the actual store and not give Amazon more money (we all give them enough money). Amazon is great for the consumer, but I don’t think it’s so great for the seller all the time. Sure, it gets their product out all over the world, but I’m pretty sure they take a big cut of sales. Plus, Amazon is always changing prices on everything and I’m sure when the prices go down it’s not great for the seller.
Either way, whether you’re supporting Amazon or someone else, the world is full of a bunch of evil faceless corporations. So, does it really matter who you support? I guess when you can it feels better to support the smaller faceless business.
A few weeks ago, I posted about attending WWE Smackdown. The week after attending Smackdown, I tested positive for COVID-19. After not getting the official disease of the 2020 Pandemic ever before, I finally got it on the two year anniversary of the shutdown.
Let me start off by saying “Thank the gods for vaccines.” I didn’t feel great for those first couple of days (fever, chills, body aches, headache, cough…), but I might have felt much worse if it weren’t for my Johnson & Johnson Vaccine and Booster shot.
*Side Quest: If you haven’t got your vaccine or booster shot, maybe it’s time to make a change? This thing isn’t going away anytime soon.
Remember a time where we used to share air with strangers. We would sit in waiting rooms or on airplanes for hours at a time and just breathe the same air as people we didn’t know. Then COVID hit, and everything got weird. We don’t even want to share the same air with certain people we do know. Now we watch old movies and shows and think, Why isn’t anyone wearing a mask?
A valuable lesson I learned from having COVID is that you can have strangers do tasks for you, and not only will they gladly perform the task, they will also say, “Thank you.”
I was told (by a doctor) to quarantine for 5-7 days from when I first became ill. I quarantined for 10+ days. I stayed out of stores, and places where the people were. When I had to ride in an elevator, I made sure it was empty.
More than once, I needed to pick up some drugs from the local pharmacy. Before driving over I called to let them know that I had tested positive for COVID. I asked if they could bring my medicine outside, so I wouldn’t have to go in the store and infect everyone — there’s no drive thru at this local pharmacy.
What caught me off guard was when the pharmacist paused after I had made my request and said, “Sure, and THANK YOU for that.” That moment was the closest I will ever come to knowing what it feels like for a veteran when someone says, “Thank you for your service.” That moment and when I finally picked up the medicine and the other pharmacist also thanked me for my service.
Not only was I doing the “right thing,” but I was being recognized for it. It was a nice feeling that I don’t get to experience very often. My next thought was should I start ordering food to pick up on the sidewalk just to be thanked again? I didn’t do it.
Me giving Roman Reigns (aka the Tribal Chief) the thumbs down, while he’s smiling because his dirty dum dum fans are giving me the COVID. Also, my buddy Shaun next to me, not getting COVID.
I’m now COVID free and ready to do stuff again, with my mask on of course. I did wear my mask to WWE Smackdown, but I also had one beer. And I’m sure that pulling my mask on and off at the beginning to enjoy that beer was how the COVID got in me. Also, being around a bunch of maskless dum dum Roman Reigns fans didn’t help.
Roman Reigns, the Usos and Paul Heyman
*There’s no scientific proof that I picked up COVID at WWE Smackdown, and I would still go to Smackdown (and RAW) in the future. It just happened to be the most crowded place I visited that week.
Last week, (March 4th) after a 20+ year absence, I finally made my return to Professional Wrestling, as a fan (with my buddy, Shaun). Friday Night Smackdown! The last time I went to a Smackdown it was still on Thursday nights, and it was still called WWF Smackdown.
In preparation for attending my first Smackdown in over 20 years, I went back to October or November of 2021 and started watching every Raw, Smackdown and WWE Premium Event to prepare. By the time we went to Smackdown I was fully caught up on the past few months of WWE wrestling, and now I’m back to being a wrestling fan.
A lot has changed in 20 years…
Back when I started watching the WWF they had Monday Night Raw or Raw is War each week. It wasn’t until later on that Smackdown became a thing, on Thursday nights. The top Superstars were The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Triple H, Mankind, The Undertaker and Kane. We had groups like DX, The Brood, The Rock and Sock Connection, T&A and the Acolytes.
I remember my first time at Monday Night Raw, when I realized that these shows were pre-taped. All of the wrestlers were talking as if it were Monday, even though the show was being recorded on a Tuesday or Wednesday. I knew that wrestling wasn’t “real combat” but for some reason this sort of took me out of it even more. I thought I was being lied to. It didn’t stop me from watching though.
Today, Smackdown is recorded Live for television on Fridays. The show started at 8 PM (after a pre-show match), and ended at 10 PM (with an after-show match). I’m pretty sure Monday Night Raw is also recorded live today.
Seat Fillers & Live Taping
We arrived at our seats a few minutes into the first match, and since our seats were directly across from the cameras filming the action we had seat fillers holding our spot (making the crowd look full). Two of the seat fillers kindly scattered off to find another empty seat to fill.
It’s fun to get to see how the whole show is made behind the scenes. We also got to see what happens during commercial breaks. Shows will cut to commercial mid-match, usually when someone is down. The match doesn’t stop though, it keeps on going.
There are also many times where the first Superstar is introduced for a match, but they cut to commercial before their opponent comes out. It’s funny to see them come out and do their thing, then the music and lights sort of go out and the Superstar chills in the ring for a bit, until the music starts back up again and we return from the commercial break to introduce their opponent.
We also got to see some commercial break crowd games. Games like “Best sign,” “Best People’s Eyebrow” and “Best DX Suck it!” Too bad they didn’t have one for best homemade shirt, or I would have won.
My homemade King Woods shirt (made with Cricut)
There are also many pre-recorded promos. You can tell when you’re there which Superstars aren’t really in the building. Those who are in promos, but never come out to the ring. There was a whole Poker bit with Happy Corbin and MadCap Moss backstage messing with Drew McIntyre, but since Happy and MadCap never made it out, it was most likely pre-recorded. Maybe even in another arena.
I also noticed that the Superstar intros are jazzed up a bit for television. Everyone knows that Xia Li’s electricity on television is CG, but I think there is even more being added into the background.
When Drew McIntyre came out we got to see some fire and explosions. It just felt like there was more thunder than lightning. Meaning I heard more than I saw, so they most likely just add some extra sparks and explosions on the TV.
Overall, being at a WWE event live was an awesome time. The one problem was that FTX Arena didn’t allow me to bring in my DSLR camera, so you’ll have to check out pictures from my iPhone. Now, let’s go over some of the matches and Superstars we got to see here in Miami.
Matches & Superstars
INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: Sami Zayn (Champion) vs Ricochet
The night began with an Intercontinental Title Match. Sami Zayn who snaked his way into being the Intercontinental Champion lost to Ricochet. There was some outside interference by Jackass’s Johnny Knoxville.
AUSTIN THEORY CHALLENGES PAT MCAFEE TO WRESTLEMANIA MATCH
Next Austin Theory came out, which was strange since he’s a Raw Superstar. Now that Smackdown and Raw are split with their own unique rosters. Theory came out to challenge Smackdown commentator, Pat McAfee, to a match at Wrestlemania after Vince McMahon had been on Pat’s podcast earlier in the week. He also slapped Pat in the face.
The second match of the evening was Naomi vs Carmella, to prepare us for the Women’s Tag Team Championship match at Wrestlemania: Naomi & Sasha Banks vs Carmella & Queen Zelina. Now that Naomi isn’t worried about being harassed by Sonya Deville, she can get some good matches in.
Both Superstars had their tag team partners at their side. Sasha was able to stop Queen Zelina from interring by smashing her face into the steps. This helped Naomi secure the win with a moonsault on Carmella. Tonight, we’ll see Sasha face Queen Zelina, one on one.
*I guess I only got a few pictures of Naomi’s “Feel the Glow” entrance, because I don’t really care for Carmella.
DREW MCINTYRE VS JINDER MAHAL
Before Drew’s match, we saw that whole Happy and MadCap pre-recorded promo I had talked about. That was to set up Drew vs Happy at Wrestlemania, a match I’ve been waiting to see.
After the promo, we took a bathroom break and missed this whole match, and Drew McIntyre’s perfectly-timed “Claymore.” We almost had another chance to see a Claymore in the bonus match, but it got reversed.
*I also only caught a few pics of Drew McIntyre’s Intro with Angela (his giant sword).
RICK BOOGS & SHINSUKE NAKAMURA (ATTACKED BY THE USOS)
I didn’t think Rick Boogs (MY NEW FAVORITE SUPERSTAR) would be here for SMACKDOWN with Shinsuke Nakamura. Last I heard, they were both injured. So, this was a sweet surprise to get to see my favorite intro live, even if it was cut short by the Usos.
I recorded the intro myself on my iPhone, but the video I found online is way better. Plus, you’ll get to see me in the background as Roman Reigns calls out Brock Lesnar, giving him the thumbs down. I’m also hoping this assault on Boogs and Nakamura will lead to a Tag Team Title Match for them vs the Usos.
TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: THE USOS VS THE VIKING RAIDERS
When I first saw the Viking Raiders I thought they seemed sort of silly, but after seeing them in action, I’m all about the Raiders. Ivar is a 300 lb high flyer, and I love when him and Erik team up and throw each other at their opponents.
The Usos are just Roman Reigns baby heel cousins. Their his little goons, but for some reason so many people in Miami love the Usos and Roman. I will admit they are fun to watch, but I’m always rooting for them to lose.
The Usos won this match to retain their title with some slight cheating. Of course, they had the Viking Raiders fly out to Saudi Arabia just to ambush them before their match and have it postponed until SMACKDOWN a few weeks later.
Even though I wasn’t able to see King Woods (aka Xavier Woods aka Austin Creed), I was happy to see both of his New Day compatriots, Kofi Kingston and Big E! They rode out on Big E’s fresh new ATV.
There was no match between Big E and Shaemus though. There was only about a minute of actual match time before Rich and Shaemus went dirty and stole Big E’s birthday present, the ATV, to take it outside and smash it with sledgehammers.
This rivalry is definitely not over, I’m sure we’ll see more of Big E vs Shaemus, and even The New Day vs Shaemus and Rich Holland. Bring back King Woods and have him take on Shaemus or Rich.
Next we got to see Johnny Knoxville challenge Sami Zayn to a Wrestlemania match from backstage. After that we saw more of Happy Corbin and MadCap’s silly antics, before Drew McIntyre showed up and ruined their fun. Perhaps they were in the building?
This was all to get us ready for the main event of the night.
RONDA ROUSEY VS SONYA DEVILLE
It was very cool to see Rowdy Ronda Rousey in her first ever SMACKDOWN match, especially to see her fight Sonya Deville. When Charlotte Flair came out to watch the match from ringside, I thought she would try to do something to help Sonya win. She didn’t.
It was after the match that Ronda invited Charlotte into the ring. Charlotte went after her, but Ronda quickly put her into an ankle lock.
BONUS: 6-MAN TAG TEAM: USOS & ROMAN REIGNS VS VIKINGS & DREW MCINTYRE
This was the best match of the night. Once the show is officially over, the crowd gets a goofy, over the top match to enjoy. It’s the end of the night and many of these Superstars have participated in a match by now, so the wrestling is a bit more sloppy. The character work is way over the top though.
The match began with one of the Usos vs one of the Vikings. The crowd kept cheering for Roman to fight, since we hadn’t seen him fight earlier in the night, and he’s the self-proclaimed “Head of the Table” and our “Tribal Chief.”
Roman and the Usos messing with the crowd in Miami
Roman kept egging us on to chant and roar, and when he finally was tagged in he would tag one of the Usos back in. It was silly, but fun. It even made me like him a little more. We also got to see Paul Heyman go after some guy in the crowd. Well, he tried to, but the Usos were holding him back.
Roman ended up taking part in the match and spearing a viking for the win. Seeing wrestling live is great, but this end of the night match made me think of our Wednesday night rehearsals at the improv theater. Doing shows for live audiences is great, but on Wednesday it was just the cast, trying stuff out for each other. That’s when we were our silliest.
If you ever find yourself at a live taping of Raw or Smackdown or anything else in the WWE Universe, make sure to stay for the extra match. Also, get there early so you don’t miss the opening “pre-taping” match.
Overall this was an amazing night. I would attend WWE live shows each and every week if I could. Instead, I will continue to watch them on TV until they come back to Miami some time later this year or next year.
Ferdi’s Learnings E&E (Events & Entertainment) is something new I’m trying out this year. This is the first of hopefully many more to come this year. It’s just my way of including more of the stuff I love on this site.
*Side note: My goal for this post was to also post my WWE 2K22 (the Video Game) review/thoughts at the same time on my other site (myVGBC.com) as a Crossover post. I’m still working on that one, but it will be up later today or over the weekend.
Back in the late 1900s and early 2000s, I was a big WWF fan (now known as WWE). I watched Monday Night Raw every week, and I even remember Smackdown coming on TV at some point during my fandom. I would record episodes on my VHS tape if I had to miss them, so I could watch them later (no streaming, TIVO or replays back then).
The Rock was, is and forever shall be my number one favorite Superstar. In fact, here’s a cool story. I’ve never met The Rock, but I do have his autograph (pictured below).
SIDE QUEST
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s Autograph
Side Quest When I was in the 7th or 8th grade there was a WWF event happening in Miami, FL and The Rock was going to be at Bayside (back when it wasn’t super gross) signing autographs. The day it was all going down I happened to be in the middle of Midterms or Finals at school, so I couldn’t skip school for that
Side Side Quest Also, my mom worked at my school so it was kind of impossible for me to skip without her knowing. I once stayed up so late on a school night that my alarm clock (yes, not my cell phone, but a clock that was created to tell you the time and wake you up), didn’t wake me up. At around noon, my teacher had asked my mom if I was sick or something, and she said no. She came home and found me asleep and took me to school.
Side Questcont. Because I couldn’t go to Bayside, my coach (Tony) went to Bayside to meet The Rock and get his autograph for me. I will never forget that. (I also have a basketball signed by Bill Cosby because of Tony, which is another story for another day).
BACK IN THE DAY cont.
In middle school, I attended three or more Live WWF events (Raw, Smackdown and one of those late night ones no one watches like WWF Livewire). Since we were just kids at the time, my dad had to take me and two of my stupid friends. My dad was not a fan of wrestling, but he did it because he loves me.
Wrestling was a big part of our lives. We would all give each other DDTs and Stone Cold Stunners. We’d Rock Bottom each other into the pool. We’d shotgun soda cans like we were Stone Cold Steve Austin. We played WCW and WWF video games from the N64 on.
But then something happened. Sometime in High School, I just sort of dropped off of the WWF train. It was like the whole Santa Claus thing (which I believed in for way too long). Sure, I knew wrestling wasn’t real, but at some point it wasn’t cool to like it anymore. I moved on to other “cooler” stuff.
CUT TO A FEW WEEKS AGO…
My parents really wanted to watch the show Yellowstone, because all of their friends were talking about it. I did the research and found out it was streaming on Peacock, so I signed up for a FREE one month subscription to Peacock just so they could watch three seasons of Yellowstone in about ten days.
One of those days I was at home working, and I checked Peacock just to see what was on there. I found some good stuff, The Office, Parks and Recreation, the new MacGruber show, a bunch of movies and sports stuff.
Then I noticed something. Off to the side on the menu bar I saw it — one tab that read “WWE.” When I went over to it, I unlocked a never-ending world of WWE (WCW, WWF and more). I could go back in time and watch any match from the beginning all the way up until today.
So, I started with what I knew. I went back to about a couple of years after I had stopped watching. I saw some of my most memorable Superstars. Some I remembered, some I had forgotten and others that seeing them instantly triggered so many great memories.
I watched some Royal Rumbles, which are the most exciting matches in my opinion. You get to see thirty wrestlers enter the ring one at a time for a giant match. The only way to get eliminated is to be thrown over the top rope and have both feet touch the ground — something Kofi Kingston has gotten very good at avoiding (click on his name to see the highlights). It’s also a good time to see which Superstars, Hall of Famers and even celebrities join the Rumble.
NEW OBSESSION
This past weekend I saw online that the Royal Rumble was happening. Also, I learned that I would be able to watch live on Peacock (no more fifty or sixty dollar PPV events). That’s amazing! I ended up watching the latest Royal Rumble on Monday, both womens and mens.
I also watched most of the other matches from that night, and of course, with every big match there’s a story of what led up to that match. This is where my WWE wrestling rabbit hole began. After the Royal Rumble traveled back a couple of weeks to see where some of this beef had developed.
I went back to a few Smackdowns from last month and last year. Next, to SummerSlam to see where the Edge vs Seth Rollins story had started. I continued to go back and forth to learn who these new superstars are. I watched some Xavier Woods aka Austin Creed matches (since I know of him from his Video Game podcast, Up Up Down Down).
And then it happened. I found my new favorite (second favorite, because The Rock will always be number one in my heart) wrestler, Rick Boogs! (you need to click on his name to see why he’s the greatest).
Go ahead, I’ll wait…
Rick Boogs
It’s Rick Boogs y’all!
I first saw Rick Boogs in the Royal Rumble in his wrestling singlet. I just thought he was some nerdy wrestler dude. It wasn’t until later on that I saw him introduce the King, Shinsuke Nakamura with his electric guitar that I thought, This is the best dude ever! King Nakamura also brings a lot of thunder to the entrance the way the music travels through his body.
I forgot how fun wrestling is to watch. The matches are exciting and crazy. The stories are stupid and fun. And the entrances are electrifying.
I mostly just wanted to share Rick Boogs with the rest of the world, and now I have done that. So, goodnight!
Remember back in March of 2020 when everything shut down and we thought, Ok, in a couple of weeks things will be back to normal. I could still go to that Elton John concert in May. Sports won’t be canceled. And all those other silly thoughts we had.
Now it’s 2022 and another COVID infested year has passed us by.
Things started to get a little better for a minute. We got our vaccines and now our boosters — unless you didn’t for whatever reason. Then all of these variants started to come out of the woodwork and ruined all of our progress.
Now, everyone is testing positive (with the Omicron) but mostly not getting sick. It just ruined their holiday weekend plans and made them stay at home for a few extra days.
Will we ever get rid of this?
But now it’s 2022 and we all have the same question — What’s next???
The answer: I don’t know.
What I do know is that in 2021 I posted an average of about two learnings per month (maybe a little more), and I plan to be more consistent this year.
Whether it’s a good year or a bad year. Whether you’re stuck at home or at the office, at least you will find some comfort in reading my stupid posts.
Just as there is no wrong way to eat a Reese’s, there is no “right way” to hit a golf ball. This is something I’ve learned after years and years of hitting golf balls (notice I did not say “years and years of playing golf,” because most of my time golfing is spent on the shooting range, hitting balls and doing some chippy-putty afterwards).
In all these years of golf club swinging, I’ve figured out that there is no one “correct way” to hit a golf ball, but there are definitely millions of things that you can be and are doing wrong. I know this because every person who has ever tried to “improve my golf swing” with some hot tip or quick lesson has told me something different that I am doing wrong (and there’s a whole lotta wrong with my golf swing).
My golf career started back in high school. At first I would go to the shooting range with my golfer buddy and hit balls with his clubs. One day, my other “golf buddy” was getting new golf clubs the next day and offered to give me his old clubs. I offered him all of the money in my wallet at the time (which was ten dollars) and my fake Rolex (which I happened to be wearing at the time). I’m sure it stopped working very soon after. It was a great deal (for me).
To this day, these are still my current golf clubs. I did pick up some others along the way, which were also given to me. I added a putter and some woods to my collection, but never a driver. I picked up a sweet golf bag of holding, as well.
Golf lessons are a bigger sham than the McDonald’s Monopoly game back in the 1900’s. If you took a one hour golf lesson with five different people, I’m sure you’d have five totally different critiques on your golf game. Swinging a golf club is like jazz music, it’s not about the things you’re doing right, it’s about all the things you’re not doing at all (that may not make any sense, but maybe it does to a few people who like jazz music).
I think golf can probably be a relaxing activity, if you know what you’re doing (but I would never call golf a sport). Most people drive around in a little cart instead of doing the one part that can be considered a sport — walking. Pros have a bag boy who carries their stuff and tells them exactly what to do. Fans are told to be quiet (in a basketball game, I’m allowed to scream as someone tries to make a free throw, but in golf I can’t make any sound while someone is swinging their club?) There’s a fancy dress code. Sports don’t have fancy dress codes.
There is so much to think about when swinging any golf club, but once you’re actually playing nine or eighteen holes, you need to drop all the thinking and be able to rely on your muscle memory. I haven’t learned how to do that yet, so I will continue to whack balls at the shooting range and play chippy-putty afterwards.
Last week, someone posted this article on the Facebook:
“TEAM USA is Sponsored by Junk Food: The Garbage Olympians Wouldn’t Eat”
You can read the article here, if you want. Go ahead, I’ll wait…
If you didn’t read the article, I will tell you what it’s about. It basically states how the TEAM USA Olympic sponsors are brands like Coke, McDonald’s and all these garbage salespeople who make the delicious poison we put in our bodies every day.
I’ve been saying this for a while, but not about the Olympics. Think of any sporting event you have ever been to here in the States (that’s what non-US people call it, “The States”). What did you eat or drink at these sporting events? Probably burgers, chicken fingers, pizza, all the delicious and fried things. You probably washed it all down with an ice cold Coke and a smile, or a Pepsi or some other liquid garbage.
*Side Note: Lately, I like to stick to Sprite, 7-UP and Sierra Mist because they’re clear. Sometimes I add some grenadine to make a Shirley Temple. It seems like there are less toxins in a clear soda, or maybe they’re just better at hiding it. Maybe it’s all in those tiny bubbles?
*Back to the other thing: If you’re over 21 you probably drink a bunch of beer at sporting events and before going inside during what we call “Tailgating.” Everyone likes to get wasted on beer and scream at their team. Some like to scream at the other team or their fans. That’s how fights happen and people get kicked out, or banned for life.
Sometimes you don’t get to go to the game, instead you’re watching from home on your TV. What do you see? A bunch of commercials from sponsors, 90% of which are all junk food and beer. Maybe sports should be sponsored by the stuff the athletes eat and drink. Not only are you watching other people exercise while you sit on your lazy butt, you’re also consuming an endless amount of calories while they are trying to burn almost half of that amount.
That’s just my opinion on sports and sponsorships, now here’s what I thought after reading this article. I know what food I should be eating, I know what’s really good for me, but I choose to eat the bad stuff instead. It’s a choice I have to live with each and every day. Maybe I should have eaten a salad for lunch the other day, but Jimmy Jamz sounded way better.
Some days, or just some meals I decide to eat a little better and that’s great. But what is “better” to me, still isn’t good to an Olympian. This guy named many things saying, “Why would I ever put this in my body?” I try not to put things like McDonald’s and Taco Bell in my body. My thirty year old body can’t handle it like my 16 year old body could.
Then there’s other things he talks about that I think of as an “OK” option. Like Greek yogurt, which he says is horrible, unless you eat plain ass Greek yogurt. Have you tried plain Greek yogurt? That stuff is gross! You need the vanilla and granola. (A few weeks ago I discovered the magic that is, Yogurt and Granola. Of course, I’ve been using vanilla yogurt and granola with chocolate chips in it — Not so healthy choice, but it is tasty.)
What I learned from this article is that I could never be an Olympic athlete. Not even for a week. I don’t even think I could eat that clean for 24 hours. Next week, I’ll choose one day to try to eat like an Olympian for 24 hours, let’s see how long it takes for me to buy some E.L. Fudge cookies and eat the whole package (I ate a whole package from Sunday night – Monday afternoon this week, but they were my favorite ones).
Next week I’ll update you with my “Eat Like an Olympian Challenge” and how far it goes… I’m aiming to start on Monday, but most diets usually start on Monday and end by Wednesday at the latest.
Last night, my co-ed adult softball team had their 3rd game, my 2nd (I missed the first one because I was too busy eating Pringles and drinking beers on the sandy beaches of Siesta Key).
We won our first game, the one I wasn’t a part of. I think it’s because I wasn’t there that we won. I am definitely the Bambino of this team. I can make some good plays, but I’m the cursed player that won’t allow us to win as long as I’m around. That’s ok with me though, I’m not there to win, and neither is about 80% of my team. We’re just there to have a good time and go drink beer and eat bar food at Sandbar afterwards.
Last week, during my first game the whole team was there, so I was able to sit on the bench for a few innings which was nice and relaxing. When I did go in I mostly played the outfield and even caught a fly ball that I definitely thought I was going to drop. I’m pretty sure everyone thought that. In the end we lost, pretty badly. We celebrated the game at Sandbar though and I won in pool and the hook on the wall game, so I went 2 for 3. Not bad for my first week of softball.
Last night, I had to play first base, because our other possible first basemen or women were not there, or don’t exist. I think I did an OK job, except for the time I ran into a girl’s face (more on that later). It wasn’t my fault, but it kind of was. There’s too many things you have to think about when playing first base.
[1] It all starts with the batter. You have to watch them at all times, and make sure that if they do make contact it doesn’t come your way. If the ball starts flying in your direction it’s panic mode, which is how I ran into this poor girl’s face with my face.
The girl was a righty, so I thought, she won’t hit it to me. I was wrong, she must have hit the ball at a weird angle because it rolled right at me. I had to move away from the bag to get it, so I then ran full speed at the base to tag it and make the out. When I started towards the base I was looking straight down to make sure to get my foot on it. I didn’t look up again until it was too late.
When I picked my head up I noticed that I was about to run straight into this woman, who was running at full speed at me. We collided on the base and I’m pretty sure she did a Willie Beamon “Any Given Sunday” flip before landing on the ground. I helped her up and told her I was sorry about 23 times. She was out, so I guess something good came out of that. I made the play.
[2] On to the next one, once the ball has been hit you have to make a decision. (a) Do I go after the ball, or (b) do I run to the base and wait for someone to throw it at me? It all goes by very quickly, there’s no time to think. Then, if you run for the ball you have to remember to run back to tag the base, and also try not to crash into the runner, as I did in the first step.
[3] If you ran to the base you just wait. Wait, and hope someone makes a good throw to you. About 61% of the throws to first are ok, but those other 39% are tricky and can really hurt someone, especially me. Playing first base is like playing paintball, except instead of small balls filled with fake paint someone is throwing a large softball at you, which isn’t very soft at all.
[4] If you successfully make the catch someone is out, unless they are really fast and already made it to the base, but that’s not where it ends. Now you have to look around and make sure other runners aren’t pulling any shenanigans. Check home. See if anyone is running there. Look at the rest of the bases. Look back to the guy on first, if that person is there. All good, throw it to the pitcher and start all over again. Overall, I think I was an alright first baseman and I would do it again if they needed me to. I may need some practice for racing to the base without smashing into the runner.
I think next week we will get the W! Or we won’t and we’ll still go to sandbar and catch Pokemon after the game.
I basically just explained how baseball works, but I do have a lot of foreigner friends who may not know. I hope you enjoyed this, and I’ll be back next week with more learnings and stuff.
This week I realized that the last heat game I went to was either during Year One of LeBron or Pre-LeBron. I can’t remember if LeBron was there or not. We were playing the Sixers and it was Black Friday. I know it was Black Friday because I had just mounted my new TV up on the wall that I bought that morning. Miss patty called me. The game had already started and she had just found out she had been given tickets. I kicked my friend out of my house telling him, “Get out! I’m going to Heat game!” We arrived after or during halftime. So, the last time I went to a Heat game I only attended 50% or less.
Why am I telling you this? Because the playoffs have begun and I still haven’t been to a game this season (or the past four or five seasons). Someone needs to take me to a Heat playoff game before it’s too late, and I’m forced to wait for another season. You’re probably thinking I could just buy tickets, but they’re hard to find during the playoffs, plus they are extra expensive.
Even when we sucked it was impossible to get playoff tickets. You had to get a pre-pre-pre-sale code. One time I had a pre-sale code for Amex cardholders and they held like 2 or 3 pre-pre-pre-sales before they even got to the Amex one. By the time I was able to search on Ticketmaster everything was gone. I’ve gone down to the arena the morning of a game, with all the dirty ticket scalpers and that didn’t work out either.
As a kid I would watch every single Heat game on TV. Back when we were no good. I would sit in my room, wearing my Tim Hardaway jersey, holding onto my basketball, yelling at my TV while watching games. I was happy when we won, and very, very angry when we lost (which happened much more).
When I got to Tallahassee for college there were no more Heat games to watch. We were forced to watch the Magic and the Hawks, so I stopped watching basketball. I still had my ESPN updates and Gamecast to let me know what was going on. Some time after college I decided that sports weren’t as important as I thought they once were. With less free time I decided to waste my time watching my shows, movies and playing guitar and video games.
I still remember the day LeBron said those magical words, “I’ll be taking my talents to South Beach.” I’m sure he quickly realized that the Heat don’t actually play on South Beach, but instead in a much smellier, dirtier Downtown Miami. At first I was excited to have LeBron on our team. That first season I watched most of our games, and all of the playoffs. I would get extra angry any time we lost a game. We had LeBron, DWade and the Bosh-man. And all those other dudes too!
After that first season I decided I can’t watch all of these normal games, because I got too angry seeing us lose with the Big Three. I knew we would make the playoffs, even if we weren’t trying. So I waited until then to watch the games that actually counted.
That year we won, and the next year I went through the same thing. Since LeBron was here and even after he left I haven’t been able to follow a full Heat basketball season. This is why I need one of you to take me to a Heat Playoff game. Please, re-ignite the Heat down in my soul! I am ready to believe in the White Hot Heat again, but I just need to see it live to get excited.
Or maybe I’ll attend a game with a nice friendly friend who decides to take me. And afterwards I’ll decide that TV shows are more important. People actually work hard writing this stuff to entertain me. Sports are just a bunch of well-coordinated high school bullies who grew up and made a bunch of money (That’s not true, some of them are nice. Look at Chris Bosh, that guys a huge computer nerd).
I’m not going to say I’m done with sports, because I’m not. I still watch FSU and Dolphin football, because those are only once a week. And I will continue to watch my Chelsea Football (soccer) matches whenever I do wake up for them. However, movies and TV will take priority, and of course video games. Thanks for listening. I look forward to hearing from one of you soon about going to one of these upcoming Heat games.
Ferdi's Learnings 