Monthly Archives: May 2021

Weight Gain Ferd-Thousand (Pandemic Edition)

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When the Coronavirus pandemic first began we were all forced to stay in our homes. Throughout year one everyone was talking about being lazy and gaining weight from all the snacking. I remember hearing Emily V Gordon say, “When we get out of this we’re all gonna be a little fatter,” on her and Kumail Nanjiani’s pandemic podcast, Staying In with Emily & Kuamil.

In the beginning of the lockdown I was still eating whatever I wanted, but due to no improv shows I didn’t have to eat dinner at midnight or one in the morning any longer. Before this all started I had a very strange eating schedule from Wednesday to Saturday, where I wouldn’t eat a full dinner before rehearsal or shows and instead would wait until I was done for the night. Also, the only food available after 11 pm or later is usually not very healthy.

At that time, with all of the late night eats I was still able to stay at a consistent weight of about 210-215. I was doing enough activity that it was fine for me to be eating so late at night. Probably not on the inside, but I looked fine on the outside.

So, when the lockdown started I was no longer eating my late night snacks/full meals (plus a late night beer or two). I was on a more regular eating schedule. I started to lose weight. Also, I was working out a lot more: running, boxing, swimming weights and anything I could do on my own outdoors or in the backyard.

Around the summertime I started eating a little more healthy, but kept working out like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Maybe not as hard as Dwyane, maybe like 25% of what he does, but that’s still a lot for a regular human. I even started losing weight.

When I saw the number on the scale going down slowly I thought of a new plan. I thought this is going to be funny, when we get back to shows in “a few months” — it’s now been over a year — everyone will be talking about how they gained weight and I’ll be that one dude that looks better than before. I wanted to be like people on sitcoms that come back in a later season looking thinner, stronger and younger than they ever have.

This plan was working. I made it down to under 200 lbs for the first time since I lived in Orlando, back in 2014-2015. I was dropping weight quickly and getting stronger with mostly boxing, running and some light weight training.

Let’s take a short break to check out my
Pandemic Workout Selfie Album:

But then something happened — the holidays. The pandemic was taking way too long to clear up. It’s still clearing up. I started working on side projects (blogs/sites) that took away from my workout time. I grew bored of working out so much, and I started eating more and more [Oreos and junk].

At some point during the pandemic I decided it was totally fine to eat cookies, chocolate, ice cream and desserts with breakfast. Sometimes I would eat these before breakfast. I’d eat them while cooking breakfast. And I’m still doing that.

My weight started to climb, because let’s face it — It’s much easier to gain weight than to lose weight. I bet Chris Hemsworth (aka Thor) has to lose weight for many roles, but it must have been a fun time to gain weight for Avengers: Endgame (even though that’s probably a fat suit). Christian Bale has done both for roles and I bet gaining weight (American Hustle) was a much better time than losing weight (the Machinist).

In the beginning of 2021 I reached my highest weight in years, possibly ever. This sucked after reaching my lowest weight just a few months earlier (mid to late 2020).

Since learning about this massive weight gain I started working out again. I’m not at 25% Rock output yet, but I hope to get back there soon (maybe higher than that). I’ve tried a few things to get me to stop eating so much cookies and chocolate and sugar, but it’s hard during a 1+ year long pandemic.

I still haven’t seen most of the world yet, so there’s still a chance of me getting back to where I was when this whole thing began. I guess that’s my goal for now. Get to where I started — around 210-215. After that I’ll go for under 200 once again.

It’s not as funny to hear people say, “Wow, you look the same” as it would have been to have them say, “How did you look even better than you did in March 2020?”

I definitely need to go down in weight before the late night eating returns. Perhaps I can change that habit too. I can just get rid of the late night eating altogether. Either way, I’m going back down and I’m going to keep working out, before I see you all in 2021 — or 2022.

Apples in Review: Vol 2 – Granny Smith

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It’s time once again for more Apples in Review. For the past few months, I’ve been tasting a new apple each week. I’m trying to get ahead for when I run out of apple varieties at The Fresh Market and am forced to visit actual farms or farmer’s markets. We’re now on to our second variety of Apple — the Green Granny Smith apple.

Green Granny Smith Apple just before taste test.

While the Red Delicious is the most famous apple, the Granny Smith Apple (aka Green Apple) is also a top-tier apple. Known for its sour taste, this variety is heavily featured in both the candy and adult beverage world. 

We’ve even seen Green Apple replace Lime Skittles. In the “original” bag of Skittles — if Green Apple replaced Lime just a few short years ago, does that make it still the “original” flavors? I don’t think so! Lime was always my favorite Skittles flavor. Did their license agreement with Limes end abruptly? #BringBackLimeSkittles! Come on, Marshawn!

“Original” Skittles flavors (although we all know that green used to be, and was better as, Lime)

Granny Smith apples are best known for their sour flavor. Although the sour flavor isn’t my favorite — eating too much gives you sticky Skittles/Starburst spit — I appreciate that they exist. If you eat a Red Delicious apple and a Granny Smith back to back, it’s kind of crazy to taste the difference between those two varieties alone. But who’s going to eat two different apples back to back? A Psychopath.

I was told (in a book, on a podcast and probably somewhere else) that Green Apples are great for heavy voice work (on-stage acting, voice over, singing). There’s some chemical in them, and only them, that clears your voice and throat. Or in gross terms — the Malic Acid within the Green Apple will clear mucus and the throat. Adding honey to ginger & lemon tea usually works for the throat, but just one bite of a green apple can do wonders.

Due to the sourness of the Green Apple it goes great with some smooth peanut butter (because crunchy Peanut Butter is for Ding Dongs). If you have a peanut allergy, which is common today, please don’t try this combo at home (or anywhere for that matter). 

Sour Apple face.

I find the Green Apple to be too sour at times and the skin to be tougher than most apples. I’m not a fan of a thick/strong skin on my apples. Now that I’m trying the whole apple and not just the inside parts, I much prefer a skin that blends in with the flavor, taste and texture of the rest of the apple.

My current Apple Ranking:
1. Red Delicious
2. Granny Smith

-based on flavors tried and written about so far

A Short History of Green Apples (according the the internet)

The Granny Smith Apple comes from Australia and was introduced to the market back in 1868. I had no idea that apples came from Australia, but I guess it makes sense for this backwards ass sour apple to come from upside-down Australia. It’s not sweet like other apples, instead it’s sour.

The name Granny Smith comes from it’s cultivator, Maria Ann Smith. Maria created this apple and was someone’s granny. The sour/tart flavors and crunch make this variety of apple good for everything from salads to pies and everything in between (candy and alcoholic drinks).

Once again I got this image from bestapples.com

While the Green Apple is not my favorite apple, it’s still a nice sour treat. I would enjoy it much more with some outside help — Nutella, dulce de leech, peanut butter. Let’s face it, I think every apple can be enhanced with “outside help.”

Easily Influenced

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Something I recently learned is that I’m very easily influenced into buying, trying and watching new things. I would have a horrible time if I ever got sucked into that Scientology building on US 1 (or any Scientology building for that matter). Cults would love me and my easily moldable brain.

Anytime I listen to a podcast with a guest promoting their latest work (movies, tv, books) I come away thinking I gotta check that out. I bought John Cleese’s and Seth Rogen’s newest books after hearing them on Conan’s podcast (both books were great). I wanted to watch all of John Leguizamo’s latest movies and his one man show after he was on the ID10T podcast.

The strangest one was not too long ago when Justin Roiland (co-creator of Rick & Morty) was on the Kinda Funny podcast. He talked about being a fidgety person, but he never wanted a fidget spinner because those are stupid. He got into Rubik’s Cubes instead — and not the ones we all had as kids. Justin became obsessed with the GAN speed cubes. Those are the ones the little genius kids use in those Rubik’s Cube solving speed competitions.

I now have three different types of GAN speed Rubik’s Cubes in my Amazon cart. I don’t think I’ll end up buying any of them but they are there — waiting. I also spent some time learning some info about them and watching speed cube videos on YouTube. There’s even a Speed Cubers documentary on Netflix (it’s now on “My List”).

I attribute these problems of mine to being a generally curious person. Anytime I hear about a new documentary, movie, album, video game or pretty much any piece of entertainment I go to the internet to learn more. Whenever I’m watching anything and see or hear a familiar face or voice, I must go to IMDB.com to find out who this person is and what else they’re in.

Recently I wrote a post for my other blog/site (myVGBC.com) where the same sort of thing happens with me in movies and games anytime a new entry into an existing series is released. For instance, the new Ratchet & Clank: Rift Apart is coming out in less than a month, and that made me start to replay Ratchet & Clank (2016) once again, even though I first played it just last year.

Anytime a new Marvel movie is announced I have to watch the movies that came before (or at least the ones that deal with those characters). If it’s a new hero, then I’ll just watch a random Marvel movie to raise my hype levels.

Maybe I’m just like a little kid. Whenever my nephew sees a commercial for a toy, no matter how stupid it is. He says, “Nono, I want that.” And I just say, “Ok, do you have any money?” And by that time another commercial has finished and he says, “Nono, I want THAT.”

Smoking on Planes

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There was a time when people were allowed to smoke cigarettes on airplanes — and they actually did it! Like all of the time. I think about this every few months and it still freaks me out.

I was on a plane a few years back (pre-COVID, but still not too long ago) and the arm rests still had ash trays built into them. They just happened to be glued shut.

A SHORT (BRIEFLY RESEARCHED) HISTORY LESSON

In the year 1990 smoking on aircrafts (to and from the US) was mostly prohibited. Pilots were still allowed to smoke in the cockpit. It wasn’t until Bill Clinton signed the Aviation Investment and Reform Act in the year 2000 that smoking on planes was completely banned. Some countries kept smoking on planes around until 2016 or later.

LINK TO HISTORY

Imagine being on a plane today and witnessing another passenger pull out a lighter or match and lighting up a cigarette. That person would be tackled so fast just for pulling that thing out, and rightfully so. Planes are smelly enough as is, they don’t need the help of someone smoking a cigarette.

“SMOKING OR NON-SMOKING?”

There was also a time, not too long ago when you’d be asked this simple question at a restaurant, “Smoking or Non-Smoking?” Meaning, do you want to sit in the clean part or the nasty part of this fine establishment? And on a busy night with no reservation the “Smoking” section was where you’d end up.

When I was in college people would smoke cigarettes in bars. Today, I can wear the same pair of jeans for weeks visiting different bars and restaurants. Back then, if I wore my jeans to a smokey bar they’d be in the hamper that night and washed the next day. Plus, I’d have to shower before going to bed.

Hotels used to have “Smoking and Non-Smoking” rooms, and I’m pretty sure many of them still do. Some unknowingly, “Would you like to stay in a room that smells like we cleaned it or one that smells like we didn’t even have enough time to change the sheets?”

Thanks to my grandmother I’ve never been a fan of cigarettes. I’ve never tried one and I plan to never try one. I loved my grandma, but I hated the smell of her smoking in our house when she would come over. Luckily, she stopped smoking early on in my life.

Whenever I find someone who still smokes cigarettes it’s like I’m meeting a strange time traveler. Of course, everyone switched over to e-cigs and vapes by now. Years later, we’ll find out that everyone is getting some sort of computer virus in their bodies thanks to all the e-smoking.

Apples in Review: Vol 1 – Red Delicious

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A few weeks ago I made a post about all of the different kinds of apples that exist. While writing that post I decided that I would attempt to try all of the different varieties of apples that I could find. I was going to start posting my short reviews of each apple on the @ferdislearnings Twitter profile, but after trying a few different types of apples I’ve decided to instead make a weekly (or bi-weekly) post featuring a different apple each post.

It’s been a few weeks and I have now tried a few different apples. I wanted to get a bit ahead of myself.

Of course, I’m starting off with the original apple — The Red Delicious. The forbidden fruit that Adam & Eve ate back in the garden. I’m guessing it was a Red Delicious apple because I bet they didn’t have all of these varieties of apples yet. If Adam and Eve were the first man and woman then there was no one around yet to create these new kinds of apples and the Red Delicious had to be the only one around, right???

Let me start off by saying that I don’t normally eat the skin of an apple. My normal apple eating ritual consists of cutting an apple into slices and just eating the inside parts and tossing the skin in the trash (where it belongs). There is also usually some Nutella, dulce de leche or peanut butter involved.

For the purpose of this apple eating experiment I decided to bite straight into these apples, skin and all. I’m not using any flavor enhancers either (nutella, dulce de leche, peanut butter…). I’m reviewing not only the taste of the inside of the apple, but also the skin.

Red Delicious Apples ($1.79/lb) at the Fresh Market

Now it’s time for Apples in Review: Vol 1 – Red Delicious

The Red Delicious Apple just tastes like an apple to me. It tastes like a regular, plain ass apple. If a candy or beverage said “Apple-flavored” on the label, this is what I’d expect to taste.

If you pick a nice one you’ll notice a beautiful, shiny red coat of skin. I’m guessing that’s why they call it the Red Delicious — it’s shiny, red coat makes it look like a delicious treat for you to eat.

I started my journey with the most basic version of an apple so that I can hopefully notice the differences when I venture out into other varieties.

The red delicious apple is refreshing. After biting into this one the inside quickly started to turn brown and loose moisture. Apples tend to do this, but this felt much faster than I’d expect. Since eating this apple I have noticed that some apples have a extremely high moisture content and this wasn’t one of those.

When biting into the Red Delicious I thought, “Yeah, that tastes like an apple to me.” This is why I look forward to trying other varieties and seeing what differences I can taste.

I don’t expect to taste wild notes of chocolate with hints of mild cherry like in coffee, but I do plan to notice subtle differences in sweetness and sour levels, moisture and other apple identifiers. I’d say the Red Delicious is our middle of the road apple. It’s got a mild flavor for those who crave a simple, plain ass apple.

image from the Washington Apple Commission (bestapples.com)

Croqueta Roulette

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Something I never really thought about but I do almost anytime I go to Publix in the middle of the day when I haven’t had lunch yet and I’m too hungry to wait until I get home — I always buy some croquetas from the Publix bakery.

SIDE NOTE: For you gringos a croqueta is a fried breaded cylinder usually containing ham inside and some other stuff too. I’ve heard someone call it a fritter before. They can also be filled with chicken, fish, cheese, chorizo, mac & cheese and all sorts of crazy stuff. I would call it the Cuban cousin to the Italian Mozzarella stick.

I’ve always been a ham croqueta person. Ham is the original. If you order a croqueta anywhere you will 99% of the time be given a ham croqueta, no questions asked. If the establishment you are at has chicken, fish, cheese or other types of croquetas they will either ask you, “What type of croqueta?” or you will have to specify, “I want a croqueta de pollo.” (Spanish for chicken croqueta).

What I do at Publix bakery to make my mid-day snack into a fun game is I usually order a few original croquetas (aka HAM) and one of either chicken or cheese (sometimes one of each). They all get thrown into the same bag and since all croquetas look about the same from the outside, it’s a fun guessing game.

The Publix bakery person usually tries to separate them with some fancy bakery paper, but that doesn’t really work because they are getting tossed around all over the bag. Also, I’m going to eat these while driving so I will not look in the bag to see how they are separated.

So, once I leave Publix and I’m driving home or to my next destination I get to play a little game I call CROQUETA ROULETTE. I stick my hand in the bag and grab one at a time. Next, I take a bite not really thinking about what’s going to be inside and I’m surprised each time.

Here’s my croqueta bag from yesterday’s game.

Yesterday I ate the cheese one first. I had ordered three ham and one cheese, so the game ended on that first bite. It was still was and always is a delicious game to play.

So, the next time you find yourself at Publix (if you’re in Florida) order some croquetas (if you’re in South Florida), and play a round of CROQUETA ROULETTE (if you’re in the car). 

You won’t regret it. If you’re not in Florida, find some kind of dumpling place that will let you order single dumplings and try DUMPLING ROULETTE. Maybe a FILLED DONUT ROULETTE. There are many ways to play this game.