[Warning: This week’s learning will be a short one, because I’m on vacation…]

This past week I’ve been in Siesta Key on vacation, like every summer of my life. I love coming here and spending the week at the beach, under a tent, hiding from the sun. I’m not excited to leave Saturday and go back to the real world, but I am excited for the Harry Potter and the Cursed Child midnight release party on Saturday night. And to finally sleep in my bed past 8 AM on Sunday morning.

What I learned this week is that I’ve come to Siesta Key for at least one week each summer, for the past 30 years, minus one or two years. That means I’ve lived in Siesta Key for about 28 weeks of my life, which is over half a year (because 52 weeks is a full year).

By now, I should be a resident of Siesta Key.

I should have a dual citizenship (Key Biscayne and Siesta Key).

I should have two voter’s registrations — one in Siesta Key, and one in Miami-Dade (that’s assuming I am already registered to vote in Miami-Dade County, which I’m about 36% sure I am).

I’ve lived in Siesta Key for the same amount of time that I lived in New York — 6 months.

When I’m old and rich I will move to Siesta Key and I will die in Siesta Key — That’s all…